Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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Justin Bieber

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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