What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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A nigger looked up his family tree and a gorrila shit in his face

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

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how black is a black man? pretty black.

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?????????????????????? ????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ...?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? you mad?

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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So a Nazi walks into a bar full of jews, he ordered a drink and mumbled slures to himself.

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mooooh im a cow

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Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

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What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

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A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

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q: whys this website gay a: kids like jaali,pawgee, and mutt

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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A kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans them up? A bear.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop

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What is black and white and red all over. A blackboard.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops