Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

Kah-________-

What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

The Economy

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

MICHAEL

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

What did the dead man say at his own funeral? Nothing, he's dead...

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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