how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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a

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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I've got a boner

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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