A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Theres two things i hate in this world... racists . . . and black people

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

thumb_up thumb_down

There once was a man from Nantucket, With a penis so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, that’d be strange.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

She was so hot every guy instantly jizzed upon seeing her. Even seeing her fingernails gave boners to thousands of people. Poor thing never had sex, no one could hold it in until they started. Maybe only Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops