What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

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What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

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Why is Steve Jobs dead, but Bill Gates isn't? Because Bill Gates wasn't diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What's 9+10? 19

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate your mom.

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Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

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Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

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what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

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A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

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Why couldn't the mexican get a job? He was seven.

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How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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