Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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banana

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A woman's opinion

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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It’s dead.

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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