what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

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What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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