what has 50 legs, but can't walk? half of a centipede

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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Woman rights.

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A white man wakes up in the middle of the night and sees a black burglar trying to steal his hard earned possessions that he slaved many hours for, being a man who enjoyed living a man of luxury and hates people of foreign nature who steal his things said to him. " get out"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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what's the difference between a black man and a lift? both can raise babies, a part from the black man

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what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, racist.

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

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How did th-A fridge.

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How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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