Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Kathy Griffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

roses are red violets are blue bannas are yellow so is my wife

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo don't be sad cause I'll be there to not in the cage but laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A Black man a Chinese man and a Jew walk in to a bar. Black man: nice place they got here Asian man: yeah I remember when it used to be that old hardware store Jew: Henry's, i think it was called Aisian man: must have been there for at least 10 years or so

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops