i'm funny

thumb_up thumb_down +29

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your social life

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it is a largely water-based, delicious fruit that provides refreshment in such a hot country and conveniently flourishes in the said climate.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops