How do you drown a blond? Keep her head underwater until her lungs fill with water and her bodily functions stop working.

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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Cows go moo.

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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What do you call a black man sitting on your couch? A house guest.

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whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says"what can i get for you Sarah Jessica Parker"

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Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

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Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

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girls lacrosse

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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What do you call a Fish without the I? Astyanax mexicanus, or the Blind Cave variant of the Mexican tetra

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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