A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

Anything Dane Cook says

Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Sgt. Richard, here... your son was raped many times by Iranian soldiers, then forced to make love to many goats and had his limbs chopped off.. he will never be able to walk, talk or poop without assistance again. OH MY GOD, NO!.. WHY!!! Haha just kidding mam, he stepped on a landmine and died.

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

A Weight loss service that works

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

69

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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