why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

What did the dead man say at his own funeral? Nothing, he's dead...

-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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