A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

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Do you need any assistance?

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yo mamas so fat, she started working out

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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Whats another word for Thesaurus?

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Compton

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

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Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

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Chuck norris eats nails for breakfast. This is most likely the cause of his bleeding stomach and acid reflux.

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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I have alzheimers but atleast I don't have alzheimers

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops