- Why can't the boy play games? - Because he was born dead.

Knock knock *silence* Knock knock *silence* KNOCK KNOCK! Hey! Can't you read the sign?! It's says "Do Not Disturb!"

C.U.M. on guys, gay jokes arent funny

Guess what?? What? I murdered your mother with a slimy piece of ham.

How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

There's a fair in a small town in Scotland. In this fair is a sheep judging contest. There are 3 sheep lined up for judging. The judge looks at the first sheep and says "Wow! This is the most beautiful sheep I've ever seen! This sheep just might win!" Then he proceeds to the second sheep. He says "This sheep is even more beautiful than the first! This sheep just might win!" Then he goes to the third sheep. He says "UGH! This is the ugliest most disgusting sheep I've ever seen! There is no way this sheep will win this contest!" And the sheep looks up at him and says, "You think I'm ugly? Well I'm not."

Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

How did the baby cross the road? The baby got stapled to a chicken

What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

Knock. Knock. Who's There? Its Jim, is Craig home? No he moved out sorry.

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

A traveling salesman breaks down on a rainy night, but spies a farm house. he knocks on the door and the farmer answers. the salesman asks if he can spend the night. the farmer says "sure, but i gotta warn you, i don't have any daughters."

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Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

Why werent you at my party? Becasue there was none!

What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

what's the best part about twenty three year olds? There is twenty of them

haikus are easy but sometimes they make no sense refrigerator

How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

Yo momma so fat, she can't preform physical exercises with proper form.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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