What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

A jew and a black man walk into a bar the black man orders a screwdriver. The jrw asks him why did you order a screw driver.? The black man answer black:I enjoy screw drivers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

lol

why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

whats better than shoes feet

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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