My sister has to take a dump

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops