the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What's just not right? Left

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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Double-whammy

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops