One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

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How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

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Austin do your class work. Quit looking at anti-jokes. Yes you the one that goes to RRHS.

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

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A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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In an all out brawl between the casts of Gilligan's Island, Hogan's Heroes and the Brady Bunch, who would be the winner? The Viewer

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What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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