Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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HEY!

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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do you like hardcore music? ya i love brokencyde

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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brock has small hands for a small job

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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