How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

A boy with red hair is happy.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

shabalabadingdong JLR

What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

No.

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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