Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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