3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

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Your eye color is very unique.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

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what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Poop.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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