Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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Guess what? You guessed it.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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How about that airline food?

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

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do you like hardcore music? ya i love brokencyde

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What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

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Youre mom is so dead...

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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