I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

What happened to my sunglasses?

Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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