Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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hi

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Christians

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

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what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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