WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

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Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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Why was the dog hairless? I lied, it was a pig.

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A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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knock knock who's there? faith

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Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens don't have the cognitive capacity to reason. So you'd never know

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A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

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police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

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Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops