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Q How do you know when a gay walks into a bar A Albert rushes over and starts feeling him up

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why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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Jokes Ki Duniya

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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