What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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