Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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A woman's opinion

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Q: What's sad about seeing a dead twenty year old lying at the corner of a street with a beer bottle in his hand? A: He owed me twenty bucks.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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