Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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