Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

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A black man walks into a bar and see's a mexican bartender. He orders some vodka.

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Knock knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Bob Matthews.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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Women's football

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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The Treatment of Steve Bartman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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