What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

What's the difference between a carrot and an elephant? The carrot is orange.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

yaa tsi tsup ari dik ari dull an dik ari dill an dits tan dool la dippyduppy dull la roop uttyroopy la goorigan gook aya gittygangool arup cha cha adippydappydill la baritztandill lan den lan doe a barik kata barip pari baribadeebadeebadee standen lan doe ya baril las ten lan day a doe la babadeadevadevadevaduv ya vou what is that little las day lan doe badakadagadaga doo doo day a doe

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black.

A man walks into a bar. The other two ducked, and then immediately called an ambulance.

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

Why does god never feel anger? Because you need to exist to have feelings.

whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

A blond and a brunette fall off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Neither. They hit the ground at the exact same time due to the laws of physics

Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

only in america: does pizza arrive at your house faster than an ambulence do banks leave their doors open and chain their pens to the desks people put their usless junk in the garage and thier expensive cars in the driveway

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

8============D PEN1S

how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

What did Lebron James say to Brad Pitt? "What's up, Brad?"

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit on the back of the bus? All the other seats were taken....

OMG I NEED FRESH WATER

Q: what did the deaf boy get for christmas? A: an ipod shuffle

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a n**ga!

Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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