Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

Golf.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

barack osama

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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