Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

Fruitcake

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

im jewish

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

Women's rights

Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...