A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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i have 2 penises

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Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin Goblin.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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Slavery

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

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the blonde choked o a gummy bear. What happened next? she went to the hospital

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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