What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Hoocaust? 3 bee stings.

whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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