Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

What is so bad about a black jew. They have to sit in the back of the gas chamber

What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

Religion.

shut up kobe!

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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