Sometimes when I'm horny, I put vinegar on my diick

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is 8===D- ? A jew with a lip piercing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -29

My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops