Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

:O <===============3 :===========3 :======3 :===3 :3 It all makes sense now.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy sharpen his pencil it was dull

thumb_up thumb_down -7

3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the student go to university? To pursue a higher education.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops