did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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sexual intercourse.

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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