A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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what does a squid and a worm have in commen they both are animals

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What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

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Are you a tree

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

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7

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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What's the difference between a plumber and a husband? Both fuck the same women when the other is away.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops