Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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Woman's Rights

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

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Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

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3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Yes!

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why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

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Twenty-Four

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Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

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How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

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Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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