Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

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Nippies

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

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Jerry.

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Jews

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

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Q:How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She didn't, she sought help and was able to live a very happy life with a beautiful family in a nice suburb outside of Cincinnati.

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What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

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A cow says moo and explodes.

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ow

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whats red and falls from a tree an apple

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

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What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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