a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

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Why did the man fall over? he had a stroke.

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How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

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Poop

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

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what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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What do you call a guy with four heart chambers, two pairs of extremities, and an aortic arch? Anatomically normal.

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Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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