Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

Hey youknow what's funny???? Jokes

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

Paul Dylan King!

I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

I have no ideas.

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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