Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

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Why did the cow have to travel everywhere by an electric scooter? It had motor neurone disease.

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Woman's rights.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Because one of them looked at him funny.

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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Why were there teeth marks in the guys arm? He bit himself

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What word does almost everyone spell wrong? Wrong.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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Hey, are you 5? Ya I am 5 inches deep in your MOM!!

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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I grammer is gooder then yours.

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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- Server, there's a hair in my soup ! - You're right, sir, I'll give you another soup imminently.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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