Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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