Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

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what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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what do you call a black person with no legs or arms? A poor man that clearly was inflicted very badly.

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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A horse walks in a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?"..... The horse incapable of understanding the humane language promptly poos on the floor and leaves.

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How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

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Democracy.

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What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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25

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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